36 Years....

So today is the day I celebrate the 20 year anniversary of my 16th birthday... and the 15th anniversary of my 21st birthday.  Maybe I am just looking at life through the rear view today... but what I know is that I am God's favorite.  There are times that I can get sad... and wonder how that 16 year old girl ended up here.  How those years between 16 & 21 were so influential in my life in general.  I am feeling a little bit old today... a little nostalgic... and a yet accomplished and secure in a way I haven't known before.

I do know more of who I am... I have had some tough lessons in leaning only on the strength of God (though retail therapy continues to be a weakness - 4 pairs of shoes - 9 days.... yeah, even the lady at Dress Barn was amazed).  I have more confidence in myself and my endurance.  Endurance has been the word of this season for me... from Backpacking, to serving, to breathing through the storm.

God has seperated the wheat from the tare in my life.  Last year this time, my phone rang constantly and I was busier than a billy goat... this year, it's a lot more laid back.  It's a lot slower lifestyle.  I have enjoyed spending more time with my kids, with my husband, with my dogs.  Hiking, biking, camping... working out... just having a great time.  Growing deep roots... and building a stronger family.  I had so much baggage that I didn't realize that I was toting with me everywhere I went... I am much lighter now.   I remember thinking this time last year that it was the happiest I had ever been.  I have pondered that a lot today and I have decided no... right now, is the happiest I have ever been.

I am blessed with friends that truly care about me and not just a bunch of people that want to be vampires in my life.  I have people that love me for just who I am.  There is security in that... there is a knowing in that.  My husband tonight as he was blessing our dinner said that he is looking forward to the next 36 years... I don't know if he was just saying that to earn brownie points (with God or I, I can't be sure).  But there is security in that.  

I do look forward to the rest of my life.  I look forward to the adventure that God has for me.  I look forward to marriages and babies, and time spent loving my kids and being Momma.  I love being Momma... and Honey... and my Daddy's Baby Girl.