I have been feeling a little frumpy lately. Nothing like a trip to the beach to remind you what women in bathing suits look like and then looking at pictures of your trip to remind you of what exactly you yourself look like. Nothing a new large pair of hoops and some layers in your hair can't fix. I am going to be 36 next week... I am feeling a little rough for the wear and tear and I am thinking that I am going to really take advantage of this change to whip myself into shape. I did spend hours riding bikes with my family on the camping trip and it is something that I enjoy I am hoping that as the weather clears I will be able to get outside and get more exercise. Not that I mind going to the gym but I prefer hiking to the elliptical and I prefer scenery as opposed to a stationery bike.
I kept looking for God at the beach since I haven't really been able to find Him here in the mountains. The new well isn't at the beach either. Old tricks... the beach used to be able to sooth my soul... now it's just a really great place to vacation with my family. I have so many memories of the beach that sometimes I have a hard time getting through the memories to look towards the future and I really think that is what happened this trip. But I still love the sand and the sun... and I really love hearing my children laugh over the sound of the waves. It was a good time but coming up I-26 when the mountains were in view it all came rushing back and my escape from reality was over. Back to these mountains... and back to the chapter that I am really ready to finish in my life.
My heart is heavy tonight and I am not sure if it is for me or for a friend of mine going through some life altering stuff. The choices that we make impact everything years down the road and I can only pray that she follows God and where He is leading her. She is on my mind because of some of the things that she has shared with me lately and I know the pain, and I emphasize on too many levels... and part of me wants to stand up and applaud her and part of me wants her to think it through a little longer. Part of me wonders if she just doesn't have more gumption... and if I am not just a slight jealous that she is flying in a new direction and I am still tethered to where I don't belong any more. Either way... I love her, and her family and tonight they are on my heart. I didn't have any advise for her... *I know, right?* but I can hug her and remind her that we love her and support her 100%... always have... always will.
For now, I am going to go ahead and close the laptop and try to get some reading done. I am reading The Gospel of Ruth by C. James. It is really thought provoking and I am sure that I will be sharing some of it soon. Good night my friends... May the Lord bless you and Keep You until we meet again.
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