1.03.2009

I keep waiting for the movers...

Well yet another unproductive day towards the move.  We don't even have boxes yet.  I am not sure what we expect to happen... but nothing has happened and I guess that's what we should expect.

I did, however, attend the most beautiful wedding ceremony ever today.  There is something to be said in this day and age for a couple to be pure at the altar.  There was something spectacular there.  There isn't a word to describe it.  The presence of God was tangible.  He had ordained it and there was no doubt otherwise. Yet, it was fun... and very reflective of the couple and it almost restored my faith in love.  It was the first wedding that I attended that the emphasis was on the ceremony and not the reception.

But while I was gone the movers didn't show up.  I just dread the work that is involved in what we are trying to do.  The simple renovations to the farm house, the packing of their stuff, the packing of our stuff...  I am just tired thinking about it.  And another day goes by and my heart breaks.  I just want to yell, Lord move, or move me.  It's excrutiating to know that I don't belong where I used to, and yet I don't belong anywhere else either.  This whole thing depends on good old fashioned work... something none of us are really good at anymore.  An object in motion stays in motion.  Well the first of October God was very clear to "Be Still" so now we are just stuck in still.  

There are times in our lives that we just want to play an ostrich and stick our head in the sand, and I guess that's where I am at today.  I just want to run, no packing, no details... just run after the dream without the consequences and without the effort.  


I love you, O LORD, my strength.
The LORD is my rock, my fortress and my deliverer;
my God is my rock, in whom I take refuge.
He is my shield and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold.
Psalm 18:1-2

I know I may be taking that out of context but it is the cry of my heart.  Lord, deliver me, even if it's just from a big case of lazybuttitis.  Deliver me from myself, and the things I do to sabatoge my own progress.  Lord, I choose to believe in you.  I choose to believe in love.  I choose to be obedient to the calling you have on my heart.  I love you...



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